I derived the phrase 'Blueberry Dusk' from exactly this: when you fall asleep in the afternoon, sleep longer than you anticipate, and you wake up at a weird time of day. It's much too late in the day now, its just past dinner time, and it's cloudy, which fills the house with an unfavorable greyish-blue light. You wake up anxious, and you don't see the clock so you're not sure what time it is or if you accidentally slept until the next day. You panic and things just don't feel right. 

This is how I feel when I let my anxiety get the best of me and I let it slip into every day life.

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This past year of my life has been especially challenging for me. It is difficult to feel trapped in an unsustainable lifestyle. We learn a lot about ourselves when we are in unfavorable circumstances, and I discovered that I overthink to the point that 95% of my own pain is a direct result of my mindset. I turned to music to provide a comfortable output and short escape from reality. Upon the completion of my title song 'Blueberry Dusk' I discovered that I want to expand more and explore the ways my mind leads me to overthink and panic as a thesis for a larger body of work. I believe that a lot of us have unreasonable, or invisible, enemies that hold us back that we don't share with others. We all have bad dreams or misread someones intentions and we assume the worst out of others - so I hope my messages in these songs are interpretable and cohesive, and that they will find the right audience. 

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I begin with the title track as a plea to a partner or loved one, asking them to stay even though I haven't been feeling so great. This acts as an introduction to the whole dilemma - a gateway into the 'dusk' that I refer to. Throughout the track list I lead the audience through different situations that caused me to spiral during different points in my life or things that still haunt me when I revert to a bad headspace. In the end I thank this person for staying.

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Feeling anxiety and letting it get the best of me is maybe a cliche topic. However, I have found peace in expressing my innermost thoughts in music and I hope to find the right audience that will listen and understand. 

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I hope to expand on this topic more in the future. But for now, please enjoy my Blueberry Dusk - EP. 

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Caroline